Where Has Foxy Gone?

I know. I haven’t been posting very much. But I swear it’s for a good reason. No, I didn’t taking pole dancing lessons. Or join a cult devoted to worshipping and snuggling with puppies. Heck, I didn’t even go on a round-the-world trip to drink delicious wine find myself.

No, what I’ve been working on is far more serious. You see, as a teenager I was sexually abused by one of my teachers. Though I reported it to the school and eventually to the police, I was never able to get justice. And my abuser remained at the school for years—putting thousands of young girls at risk.

He died a couple of years ago, bringing an end to a painful chapter of my life.

Last Fall I wrote an essay, “When the Legal System Fails Sexual Assault Victims, We Have to Find Our Own Closure,” for The Washington Post. In that piece, I was talking about healing and closure. I wanted to move on and put it all behind me.

But that’s not what happened.

Though I didn’t use his name, many people recognized my abuser and came forward to tell their own stories of abuse at Presentation High School. I could have turned my backs on these victims, but that’s not what good people do. So, I have spent the past several months advocating for the survivors and trying to protect current and future students at the school and in the surrounding communities. BELIEVE ME, I’d rather be telling dirty jokes and engaging in ridiculous shenanigans, but we do what we have to do.

Fortunately, some people understand the importance of my advocacy. Scary Mommy graciously featured our movement on their website. Take a look. Give it a read. And help us protect our children from sexual abuse.

You can also check out Make Pres Safe for more information and follow us on Facebook and Twitter.

Thank you for sticking with me as I take this slight—but very important—detour in my life.

xoxo,
Foxy

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15 Responses

  1. First off, I’m am so very sorry you had that happen in your life…and even more, as a child.

    Second, you already know I think you’re amazing, but this takes it to a while different level of awesomeness.

    I’m proud of you for speaking your truth, but even more for standing and speaking for those who probably felt (until you came along) that they had no voice.

    Be proud of yourself…dirty jokes are always around…heroes (unfortunately) aren’t.

  2. I am so sorry you had to endure such horrific behavior and assault by a person who was supposed to be an educational role model. You are brave beyond words and I respect you wholeheartedly ?❗️

  3. I’m so sorry you were hurt in that way.

    Thank you again for using your prodigious writing talent to shed light on the ugly experiences we face as well as making us laugh. You rock.

    xoxo

  4. I am so glad to hear you’ve been busy with important (but painful) work. I was worried you had a health crisis. Thank you for all you do.

  5. I have been a behind the scenes rape victims advocate since my marital rape 30 yrs ago. Although painful, you have done a great thing to stand with those who has suffered the same as you. I applaud you and know from personal experience just how exhaustive, yet rewarding, your work has been.

    You rock!! Keep on being you!

  6. Thank you so much for what you’re doing. As both a teacher and a mother of two daughters, you are so brave and what you are doing is so, so important. I hope you find healing and closure.

  7. You’re a goddamn legend and a hero. You do what you have to do and we love you for it. Thousands of followers are awesome but nothing ….. NOTHING is stronger than the power of one with a huge voice, and you have it. You’re awesome and do not change!

  8. Your advocacy is not a detour. It’s an important part of your journey. Important for you. Important for all of us.
    You’re doing the hard, messy work needed to make the world a better, safer place for everyone.
    I am very proud of you. I hope you are very proud of yourself.

  9. Hi, Kate:

    Don’t get discouraged about the Prez leadership circling the wagons. Laura and I support you and your cause, and believe you 100 percent.

    Encouraging news today about Bill Cosby’s verdict, so the national mood regarding sexual abuse is changing for the better. Back in the 1970s I often ate breakfast at the Mini Gourmet counter. One day a young woman was at the counter talking about her dad, a Tahoe cab driver, talking to her about Bill Cosby. Cosby frequented the Tahoe/Reno area to perform and vacation, and her dad had told her he and other cab drivers had taken prostitutes to Cosby’s hotels, and his nickname among service people at Tahoe was “Kinky Cosby”. Of course, people did not believe the story, myself included, but I sure believe the story now.

    Remain strong and committed, as the veil over the corrupt Prez leadership will soon be pierced, and you and other victims will be vindicated.

  10. Something that shaped you so deeply as a child has led you to where you’re supposed to be right now. Using your powers for good is going to give you much needed peace!

  11. Thank you for your lovely heart and dedication. You are a blessing to us all.
    Love you!

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