While walking Ziggy the Dog last weekend. I ran into a childhood friend. It’s been almost two decades since I last saw her, but I recognized her right away. I walked up to her to say hello. She replied, “I thought that was you. I saw you talking, but I wasn’t sure. Then I saw your butt, and I knew it was you.”
Now, my name is not Beyoncé so I’m going to assume that wasn’t a compliment. What the fuckity fuck? Clearly I need to do more squats. Or just drink more wine and forget about it. I’m pretty sure I’ll be focusing on the latter.