Yesterday, I was at my happy place (Target) enjoying the many delights that The Store has to offer. I turned the corner to peruse the clothing section when my senses were assaulted by this:
Leggings. With cats flying through space. CATS! FLYING THROUGH SPACE! CATS!!
I had so many conflicting thoughts going through my head:
Me: “Those are all kinds of wrong.”
Myself: “But they’re CATS. FLYING THROUGH SPACE!”
Me: “So, so very wrong. They’re fucking horrible.”
Myself: “Do you see their cute little paws out in front of them? Like they’re actually flying?”
Me: “You haven’t looked good in leggings since high school.”
Myself: “And the stars! So many pretty stars!”
Me: “And it’s debatable that you looked good in leggings then.”
Myself: “And look at the auras around each of the kitties. So cute…”
Me: “Well… I could make endless pussy jokes. And FLYING pussy jokes. I bet Dan would think they’re hot.”
Myself (feeling the fabric): “Or, I could just wear them while working out…”
Me: “They’re so ridiculous. So fabulously ridiculous.”
While I stood there debating, I decided to take a picture of the leggings. You know, just to prove that they were actually real. Colin, who is my shopping buddy, took his focus off of his ICEE long enough to notice the leggings.
Colin: “Awwwwwwww, those are so cute. They have kitties on them. You should buy them, Mom.”
Then, in an unprecedented moment of fiscal responsibility, I decided not to purchase the leggings.
Me: “No. They are not on our list. And money is tight right now.”
Colin shrugged, and we walked away. How easily he forgot about them.
The problem was, after we left The Store, I kept thinking about them. And I kept looking at the picture I took of them. So, finally, I sent the picture to Mr. Foxy.
“I hope you bought those…”