My son Colin and I pull into Target after dropping off my daughter at dance. His eyes light up. (He loves Target as much as I do.)
Me: “Sorry we have to go to Target, Colin. I know how much you hate it here.”
Colin (still grasping the concept of sarcasm): “I’m on to you, Mom. I know about your opposite jokes.”
I smile proudly.
As we shop, Colin comments on the prices of patio furniture and how one chair is considerably more than a set of 4 chairs. (He’s 8 and already a savvy shopper—his future spouse can thank me later.) I say something about how sometimes store prices seem out of whack.
Colin: “Yeah, they’re really wacky.”
Me: “Oh, believe you me, I KNOW.”
Colin: “What?! You’re talking funny.”
Me: “I know. Sometimes mom talks funny.”
Colin: “Maybe it’s all the wine you drink.”
So I burst out laughing. Pretty loudly. Because that’s funny.
And then I explain to him the difference between drinking a glass of wine and a bottle of wine. And drinking responsibly and doing stupid things (like driving) after drinking. I really think I’m hitting home with this talk. I’m feeling like a good parent. And then…
Colin: “By the way, can you not laugh that loud next time? People were looking at you.”
I stop. I reflect on everything he’s told me at Target. In the space of 15 minutes, he called me a sarcastic, funny-talking, wine-drinking, loud-mouth.
Yep. That about sums it up.
34 Responses
HAHAHAHAHAAH
There are worse things to be called….
There really are. I was kind of proud.
And that’s why I love you!
The feeling is mutual, Babe! xoxo
That’s excellent. My son is 10 and starting to try out sarcasm for himself. Only he calls it “sarcasticism”. And he misses more than he hits at this point. That’s ok, with a mom like me he’ll certainly have it down by the time he hits Middle School.
Sarcasticism. I love it!
Don’t forget he also doesn’t think you know math.
Oh, he pretty much thinks I’m an idiot alright.
At least he didn’t tell you that your butt was big, too! I’ve got one who thinks I’m a smart ass. Of course, he’s just as big a smart ass (wonder where he gets it…?).
He didn’t. But he did tell me that I needed to use Celtrixa to get rid of my stretch marks. Thanks, Colin.
LOL – reminds me of the time I was driving and my son yelled “STOP THE CAR!!” Startled the heck out of me, but I calmly asked why – what was wrong. He said – you’re not SUPPOSED to drink and drive! (I had just opened a can of coke). I explained what drinking and driving really was…and that it was OK for me to drink a can of coke – as long as I was paying attention to the road.
OMFG. That’s priceless!
Perfection.
He really is.
Hahaha – I love your kid. Sounds like he has a good head on his shoulders and his eyes open wide.
He’s pretty amazing. I so excited to have a front row seat to him growing up.
Excellent!!!! I would have not only laughed loudly at his comment I would have snorted! My kids just love when I do that!
I guffawed. That’s about on par with snorting. 🙂
Parenting… you’re doin’ it right.
Yeah, I was pretty proud of this one. (Thank you!)
My son, 17, looks at me like I’m drunk all the time. I even offered to wear a breathalyzer necklace. Seriously, I’m sober MOST of the time. I’m just weird.
I’m just weird too. That’s why we get along so well.
Aww… I love your son. LOL!!! aaaand you!
Awwww, the feeling is mutual. xoxo
Sounds like a smart kid!
He got that from me. Natch.
He sounds just like my son! And you sound just like me.
This must be why I like you so much.
Mine constantly asks (tells?) me to rather stay in the car, cause my hair and or outfit looks funny. bleh
I’m getting there, I’m sure. He’s too young just yet.
Ahahaha! Awesome.
Colin’s good like that.
That is so funny! I’ll be listening a little more closely at the things my kids say to me now. I’m sure they’ve been calling me plenty of things and I wasn’t sharp enough to pick up on it.
My boys have all told me that they get their insanity from me and I feel so proud. Colin is obviously learning well from you so congratulations on a job well done!