Motherhood Is Disgusting
After the umpteenth spit-up, the zillionth dirty diaper, and the inevitable projectile poop, you realize: Crap. Kids are messy.
After the umpteenth spit-up, the zillionth dirty diaper, and the inevitable projectile poop, you realize: Crap. Kids are messy.
Are you sick of hearing about the drought in California? Want all of the whining to end? Just wish we would stop flushing and let the yellow mellow
Exercise. It’s a dirty word. I hate it with the fiery passion of a hangry Jillian Michaels. I have no choice though: I have to
I have an amazing super power. It’s the ability to remember the lyrics to every single theme song from popular shows in the 70s and
Do not gloat on social media. Seriously. It’s unbecoming and unflattering. It makes people hate you, and it makes Murphy tap his evil fingers together
Believe it or not, I am actually a bit shy and awkward in-person. No, really—I am. Especially in groups and with new people. So when
Recently one of my college friends, Birdie (you know, Birdie of We-Had-Dinner-with-John-Waters fame?), came over for a visit. As we worked our way through a
So you need to have a camera shoved up your ass, huh? Don’t despair—it happens to all of us eventually. Whether you’re fifty, have a
I do and say a lot of ridiculous things, and people don’t bat an eyelash. I walk my pit bull down the street, and I
I am a horrible person. How do I know? Because Cards Against Humanity is my absolute favorite game in the entire world, and it’s “a
So it was Penis Week last week on the blog. I swear I didn’t do that intentionally, but that’s how these things go sometimes.
Last week, my Grandma gave me some delicious beans she had cooked up (she makes the best beans in the world, I kid you not).
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